2008
The Top 22 Twitter Posts of February 2008
I favorited 373 tweets in February 2008. These are the top 6%, in no particular order:
in the case of the bucket of fetuses last night, a dream is not, in fact, a wish that my heart makes emilybrianna
Macys lady: Didn’t you find any nice purses? Me: They’re a bit mature for me. Her: What about Coach? Me: *points to robots on current purse* ShuffShuff
In this moment, no one in this mall would judge me if i domestically violenced my boyfriend. EffingBoring
I love it when you’re searching for X, Google says “Did you mean Y?”, and then gives you zero results. It’s very French. scottsimpson
Every time you sniff and say somebody has “too much free time,” the part of you that used to love making things for pure joy dies a little. hotdogsladies
Apparently it’s not ‘money’ to cry at a strip club. lonelysandwich
Havent had sex in sooooooo long. Its gotten to the point where i masturbate thinking of other times i masturbated. irc
.5(self-deprecation) + 1.5(nerd terminology) + 2(unspoken shared experience) = twitter success echuckles
Sticking post-it notes on people so I can remember who I would sleep with sober. DieLaughing
Sometimes my heart suddenly catches fire for the beauty of life. (Classified in the DSM IV as a “hypomanic” state of Bipolar II disorder.) serafaery
Today’s lunch special: “Jamaican me crazy! jerk chicken (or tofu)” Which I suppose is better than “miso solly! soup” jimray
Announcing that all major research projects from now on will now be referred to as “Bubblegum Wrappers” so as to lessen the terror involved. ShuffShuff
John: “The Shining is about a Daddy who likes to drink who pretends to write all day.” Jonas: “That movie is about us!” I hope he’s wrong. AmyJane
“Are you making fun of me?” “No.” “That’s your yes voice.” cleversimon
whats a @scobleizer? He just added me. Thats a silly name Makenna
Drove past a bus today whose destination was, according to its display, “Walmart’s”. Say, when does the bus for literate people come by? EffingBoring
Why is there a pinata in the den that looks like me? And why was it filled with printouts from my poetry blog and then beaten with a rake? fireland
I just recently got into Star Trek. It’s relaxing to watch and listen to people who are polite to each other and enjoy their jobs. eliohouse
Dear America Quilts Creatively, I disagree. magnetbox
Charlie was a chemist / But Charlie is no more / What Charlie thought was H₂O / Was H₂SO₄ cleversimon
I think you all should know I assign different voices to each of you when I read your tweets. apelad
In the future, Jelly Bellies will simply induce temporary synesthesia. al3x
Honorable mention (31-Jan):
Thankfully, there is no established symbol for The Force, or there’d be a lot of tragic ink out there. phylhrmnix
