Remiel

Nice Guys Finish Spiteful

Tue, 08 May 2012 16:31:09 -0400

Stop thinking that what people so loathingly refer to as the “friendzone” is some sort of purgatory women put “nice guys” into. My friendship is not a crappy consolation prize that you’re left with if I deny you a sexual relationship– and my body is not your reward for good behavior. Thinking that simply being a “good guy,” whatever that may mean, entitles you to unlimited sex with the girl of your choice shows that you don’t truly believe women should be in control of, and have full ownership of, our own bodies; instead, it shows you think we should use them like doggy treats whenever you do the human equivalent of a jumping trick. If you treat us as humans, that’s fantastic, but we do not owe you for it.

— Develle Dish

Solitary Confinement Is Torture

Mon, 07 May 2012 17:45:00 -0400

Solitary confinement is torture.

First, an extreme case of an accidental, 4-day solitary confinement without water.

AP News via Gruber:

[As] the days dragged on, the terrifying realization set in that he was trapped. He had been forgotten in a 5-by-10-foot windowless room, hearing only the muffled sounds of voices and toilets flushing in the Drug Enforcement Administration facility in San Diego.

On the third day, he began to hallucinate. He urinated on a metal bench to be able to drink his urine. He stacked a blanket, his pants and shoes on the bench and tried to reach an overhead fire sprinkler, futilely swatting at it with his cuffed hands to set it off.

Then, the engineering student says he gave up and accepted death. He bit into his eyeglasses to break them. He says he used a shard of glass to carve “Sorry Mom” onto his arm so he could leave something for her.

Let’s concede right away this man’s experience was far worse than that of a “typical” solitary prisoner, who wouldn’t normally be denied things like water, food, toilet access, and certainty of release. (I mean, you know, unless you’re a “terror suspect”. Those guys hate puppies and eat babies!)

But ask yourself: would you rather spend 30 days in solitary or be whipped a dozen times? My bet is even if you think you prefer solitary, you’d change your mind after experiencing them both, and being able to compare: Wikipedia | Solitary Confinement: Criticism

Ironically, whipping prisoners is considered inhumane, while solitary confinement is tolerated as if it were just “grown-up time out”.

I think our bias stems from the vivid imagery. When we imagine being whipped, we imagine immense pain, streaks of blood, and screams of agony. We partly experience it ourselves. When we imagine solitary confinement, we see a person, alone in a quiet cell, waiting for release. For most of us, “intense loneliness” is the nearest related thing in our empathy portfolio. If imagining a whipping is like smelling strawberries without eating them, then imagining sustained, solitary confinement is like smelling a strawberry plant that won’t bear fruit for another month.

Since our imagination is better at conjuring up a brief experience of agony than it is at emulating the hour-by-hour, mounting horror of isolation, we choose to “spare” our prisoners the cruelty of the whip, so we can put them through a quiet hell that lets us sleep better.

misseffieb: There’s a picture of me in a bee costume on my...

Sat, 28 Apr 2012 17:57:00 -0400

misseffieb:

There’s a picture of me in a bee costume on my OKCupid profile. The costume does a good job of drawing attention away from my problem areas, namely that I am a huge asshole. But I have always felt that honesty is important in a potential relationship.

I love you so hard, misseffieb. Utilizing my loving feature, even.

An Honest, Actual Exchange from last week's Parent-Teacher Conferences:

Sun, 04 Mar 2012 21:47:11 -0500

phylhrmnix:

PARENT: So, has [the show] The Big Bang Theory increased awareness of science and scientists?

ME (too exhausted to self-censor): …really, only in the sense that The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air increased awareness of what it was like to be Black.

Photo

Sun, 20 Nov 2011 16:55:10 -0500

What the hell is

Thu, 06 Oct 2011 10:03:06 -0400

What the hell is

Modal logic axioms in the form of assertions about cats.

Mon, 05 Sep 2011 11:22:00 -0400

Generally accepted modal logic axioms:

It’s necessary I hate cats if and only if it isn’t possible I don’t hate cats.

It’s possible I hate cats if and only if it isn’t necessary I don’t hate cats.

It’s necessary that I hate cats and cats suck if and only if it’s necessary I hate cats and it’s necessary cats suck.

If it’s necessary I hate cats and/or it’s necessary cats suck, then it’s necessary I hate cats and/or cats suck.

If it’s necessary that (if I hate cats, then cats suck), then (if it’s necessary I hate cats, then it’s necessary that cats suck).

Controversial modal logic axioms:

If it’s necessary I hate cats, then I hate cats.

If it’s necessary I hate cats, then it’s necessary that it’s necessary I hate cats.

If it’s possible I hate cats, then it’s necessary that it’s possible I hate cats.

If I hate cats, then it’s necessary that it’s possible I hate cats.

Photo

Sat, 03 Sep 2011 23:56:49 -0400

Leela: Fry. Can we talk about our relationship? Fry: Of course!...

Fri, 02 Sep 2011 19:58:00 -0400

Leela: Fry. Can we talk about our relationship?

Fry: Of course! Our relationship is the best thing in my life, so I’m sure I’ll enjoy talking about it with you.

Small island in the South China Sea, near Hoi An, Vietnam. May...

Fri, 05 Aug 2011 12:59:18 -0400

Small island in the South China Sea, near Hoi An, Vietnam. May 2010. (Taken with instagram)

Santa Barbara, CA

Thu, 04 Aug 2011 10:53:00 -0400

Santa Barbara, CA

Lonely swing in Sa Pa, Vietnam.

Thu, 04 Aug 2011 08:56:00 -0400

Lonely swing in Sa Pa, Vietnam.

ourinvinciblesummer: porn.

Thu, 28 Jul 2011 16:16:23 -0400

ourinvinciblesummer:

porn.

nerd courtesy.

Sat, 16 Jul 2011 22:43:27 -0400

he: There's no good time to confess this, so I'll just come out with it.
he: I... played Dungeons & Dragons as a teen... and loved it.
he: I... I'll go pack my things now.
he: I never "LARPed" though (... not cool enough).
she: cool shmool. i've got a leather body suit, knee high boots and some pointy elf ears from Halloween.
she: let's go. i'll be your fairy fucking godmother.
he: Halloween doesn't count or something... I forgot what I was saying because now I'm weirdly turned on.
she: focus! we have a kingdom to protect.

Bedhead. UV protected.

Wed, 13 Jul 2011 16:31:00 -0400

Bedhead. UV protected.

The difference between thought and deed

Thu, 16 Jun 2011 19:33:00 -0400

You know when you’re driving, and someone pisses you off, and for a moment, you sincerely wish they’d burst a tire and careen off the road? Yet, if a fairy materialized in your passenger seat, and offered to actually drive them into a guard rail with a wave of her wand… you’d think a moment, chill the fuck out, and decline her offer.

That’s the difference between thought and deed. It’s why reading someone’s diary is so heinous and self-destructive: you cannot hold them accountable for what you “learn”… but neither can you forget what you’ve just read.

Host a Red Square (AKA "Living Out of a Backpack Part 0")

Wed, 15 Jun 2011 20:57:00 -0400

Want to host* a red square for a bit? And by that I mean: me, on your couch. You know, hosting-hosting. Not “hosting”.

I’ll write more about “perma-traveling” and working from a laptop, soon. Short version: it’s awesome.

For now, here are the bullets:

This is something of an experiment. It’s going great so far. I’ve spent the last few weeks at the kickass and amazing Colleen Wainwright’s place in LA.
I’ve spent the last few years turning this Twitter+Tumblr thing into something special. It lead to me quitting my job and making a living as a freelancer. It’s lead to amazing friendships with beautiful people, and my life has changed drastically. Who knew “posting stupid shit on the internet” could do all that?
Now I’m taking it to the next level. Instead of flying back “home” to Brooklyn next week (to be with the admittedly kickass and amazing @EffingBoring and @phylhrmnix)…
… I’m looking to keep bouncing around the west coast for a bit.

OK, but WHERE and WHEN?

Contact me.
Starting next week around 21-June. That’s just the beginning, though, in theory. More later.
Any or all of: California, Oregon, Washington, British Columbia…
… for now. Today the west coast. Tomorrow the world!
One week, two weeks, three weeks… whatever. I can always fly back to NYC if I need to or want to.

I mean, yeah, paying rent sucks. I hate it, too. What makes you special? Do you NEED a place, or just WANT a place?

Want.

Can you provide anything in exchange?

I’m open to doing some occasional bartering for web design / strategy / “social media” reality checks / etc.
I could pay you money, but that would go against the grain of this whole freeloading hippie thing I’m doing.
I’ll do your dishes and entertain your family and pretend to like petting your cat.
Non-profit work extra-preferred on the bartering front.

How do I know you’re not insane / How do you know I’m not insane?

You don’t / I don’t. (Though I don’t much care.)
I’ll get a proper “perma-traveling” site up soon, post some “Facebook kissy face pictures”, and throw up a portfolio later when I’m between clients.
For now, it’s all on faith, baby. You could read my Twitter, but depending on who you are, that might help or hurt.
About me.

I think your idea is retarded and / or I don’t live on the west coast, but I love you and wish you well.

I love you too.

To contact me, remove the lowercase letters:

Avoid refined sugar.

A Cosmopolitan Magazine cover parody… barely. By...

Thu, 02 Jun 2011 17:22:00 -0400

A Cosmopolitan Magazine cover parody… barely. By Remiel.

View full size on Flickr.

I’ve been sitting on this thing for almost a year because every time I return to it, I worry Cosmo’s already so absurd, it’s impossible to satirize them. Finally, I just decided to add some “FUCK”s to make it obvious, and call it done.

LOLZ.

Wed, 25 May 2011 19:44:26 -0400

LOLZ.

“An Audio Message to Salon.Com” by Jason Scott.

Wed, 25 May 2011 17:54:00 -0400

“An Audio Message to Salon.Com” by Jason Scott.